Its 3:06am in the morning on a Sunday night, lounging on a fabric couch which offers a great bit of comfort. Deep south more inland than tourists like to be in Florida. Work in the morning yet coffee after 12pm will keep ur mind up late.
I kind of feel like I am in a productive mood to make use of my time while Im awake. Perhaps I don’t have the luxury to sleep just yet until I make it. But then my thoughts attack each other and the other side begins to churn.
Sleep is well needed whether or not you’ve made it. Lack of sleep will shorten your telemeters which you die younger, I’v heard that somewhere.. So even if you didn’t make it and you lose sleep trying to get it, at the end you will have lost cuz you cant enjoy it if ur dead.
I’d continue to argue with myself, saying well I cant enjoy the life I have now because it seems like any waking moment is in the pursuance of money anyway, without it we will be on the street and starving.
Perhaps the sacrifice of the telemeters for our children’s children to live better it will be worth it. Anyway how are you suppose to forget about your money problems if you haven’t paid your house off in order to relax.
But then again growing food, on a cheap plot of land with a constructive plan homestead can seem relieving. This plan can be intoxicating which its not well adopted by many. They say those who live closest to their food source live the longest.
This can go on for days as it is written out by thumbs on my iPhone, takes more time to articulate to an audience. The physical movement of my thumbs cant be any faster as my pinky supporting the phone upright is cramping as I lay on my back with my feet up on the arm.
The money we can say we all need can be utilized in many different ways, other than the ways we view in the world. Which is another argument in itself.
There is no lawful money if you figured it out and if u can forget what you have learned from literally everywhere. Another argument in itself.
I still sit here writing as the clock ticks and the night slips further away as the sun approaches.
As I try to relax Id have to remind myself that nothing matters. Everything is not to think about. Just forget about everything. I have to remind myself over and over and I begin to believe it.
This happens, and I could literally live like this which I feel is a common practice. If I forget for too long and wake up weeks or months later as I go back to where I’v left off the weight is heavier to carry.
And it seems like Iv picked up other peoples weights being that I forgot about my own. I seem to have a kind of bezel people like to unload their emotional problems there to.
It seems that my empath ability and willing nature to be a beast of burden is utilized which I can be a sure tank carrying heavy loads for the team. Its a let down for people change their behavior whilst in my presence either for good or bad.
People get paid for this kind of work as therapists or psychologists, etc.. These people are approached and pay to be understood and brought back onto the right path which puts the encounters in a box and considered a practice.
I suppose I just volunteer. I have to be more aware of my habits and my interactions and protect whats mine. A constructive conversation into other people lives who are willing to divulge information builds contrast and perspective.
I listen to many podcasts and the conversations that are beheld are windows into whole other worlds via language. I can immerse myself in the language and get lost.
Having so many perspective I reminisce on all the knowledge gained. I can pull quotes from notable interviews and gain the energy given from the memory of the time listened.
Yup so The writing can continue but perhaps I can relax now and shall find a movie I can fall asleep to, probably one Iv watched 100 times. Oh btw Thanks for being here.